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Monday, March 1, 2021


LOVE AGAIN – I am alone this evening, and I am alone because of a cruel twist of fate; a phrase which here means that nothing has happened the way I thought it would. I was once a content man, with a comfortable home, a successful career, a person I loved very much, and an extremely reliable writer, but all those things have been taken away from me, and now the only trace I have of those happy days is the beard below my chin.

[bctt tweet=”Loving someone that does not love you is like loving the rain that falls in the forest. ~African Proverb” username=”theowlcampus”]

As I sit in this very tiny room, writing this with my pen, I feel as if my whole life has been nothing but a dismal play, presented just for someone else’s amusement, and that the playwright who invented my cruel twist of fate is somewhere far above me, laughing and laughing at his creation.

And just like my very close friend, Loveth, would say, “It is much easier to fall in love than to stay in love.” Well, that is very true and it’s a fact. And maybe I should even start with this; that when any girl asks you “what can I do to you that you will never forgive me again?” hmm…dear brother, please you should know quite well that something is fishy. You know ladies talk in parables? Okay, now you know.

Oh apologies, I forgot to tell you my name. And it’s better late than never. My name is Lover-boy. Yeah, exactly what you’re thinking. My parents never named me Lover-boy, and even none of my friends calls me that name; but the scripture says “by their fruits, ye shall know them.” I am been optimistic for knowing myself at the early stage of my life. And this has brought about the name. I am a boy that loves love.

If there were to be awarded for the person with the highest number of relationships in UI, you need no preacher to tell you it’s gonna be me. Yeah, I’ve been that bad. Even though it’s not all my fault. I came into this school with no girlfriend(s). And just like what you also did, I sealed my mind from all negativity; I made up my mind never to go into any relationship till I graduate from this university. This determination helped me a lot since my first day on campus.

But after years of endurance, perseverance and dedication, I finished my 100L and 200L without being emotionally attached to anyone. How I did it is still a mystery even to myself. I could stand on my decisions without any wavering thought, and it helped. But like they say, nothing lasts forever. Maybe I was also subjected to change at some point in life, or I was just acting according to the prepared script, I can’t really say.

Kemisola was the first girl to see by boxers. Oh sorry, I didn’t mean what you’re thinking o. But maybe I should explain better. They say, “what doing at all, is what doing well.” When I was loyal and single without a girlfriend, I was determined and it worked; and now that the wheels of the drive have changed, I had to put my best in it.

Before Kemi crossed my path, I had always believed the popular saying that “you know who you love but you can’t know who loves you.” But maybe love blindfolded me, it never occurred to me that I could be heartbroken.

They say a broken heart hurts much more than a broken backbone. There is surely some medicine to heal the pain of a wounded back, but no medicine can soothe the terrible pain of a broken heart. It’s better to break the back falling from a tree than to break your heart falling in love. Kemisola was an Awoite.

And just like every other random Awo girls, she had bent legs. Kemi could cry for Africa. Well, we started having issues when she lied to me that she wanted to go to the vigil but actually went for a night party. I said earlier that she could cry for Africa, yeah. After being cut red-handed, Kemi would use anything to swear, even her womanhood. Ha! Kemisola!! A lady of evil thoughts; – she even said she dreamt that I fell down from Awo hall the third floor of Block B when I came to visit her.

Lol..it is me that someone will be bullying. Maybe I was too much into her, I could forgive anything she did. And being my first love on campus, even though she was not that beautiful, but her ‘backyard’ was a mountain; our moments together were never a dull one. Yeah, you know how Awo girls die for love na.

We broke up a day before a year anniversary of our relationship. Very funny. She sent me a list of things we’ll need to use to celebrate it. And she said she had invited her friends to celebrate with us. You say wah? Invited your friends to whose birthday? Or who died? I was confused.

Because of the love I had for her, I tried to subdue my anger till I remembered a popular verse that “love does not kill.” I believed quite well that she wanted to kill me with the 37,000naira list of items she brought just a day before our one year anniversary. Well, since I was not born with a girlfriend, I only grew up to meet her, so it’s not evil if we pathways – my life first!

After I broke up with Kemi, I was attracted to another Awo girl. Busola can smile ehn. She definitely used her smile to get me. We dated for a week and two days. Oh no, don’t put the blame on me o. Do you even know what she did to me? Okay, I have always wanted to attend her departmental dinner. She said the amount for the ticket was 3,500naira. I paid for her and myself – making 7,000naira.

We went for the dinner only to know that the dinner ticket was 1,500naira. Ha… I was angry not because she dumped me, but because she still denied it. I was shocked when she started crying too. The spirit of Kemi had entered her. Lol…or maybe we can conclude that Awo girls cry when they lie.

My love journey with Busola ended that day. Not only because she defrauded me, but because I was actually tired of her already. Busola could not boil an egg. We spent the most of our resources on food in the cafeteria.

This and some other things she did, I proposed a breakup. After Kemisola left, I have seen no one that could replace her in my heart. So, the little mistake Busola made was something that I could have actually forgiven if I was still interested, but hell no! For the third time in a semester, I met another girl also from the same Awo hall.

Lol..don’t ask me why Awo again. I could not have actually attempted to approach her, but her beauty was out of this world. Not too tall, not too short, not too dark, not too light; and trust me, she was the first girl from Awo hall that I would see without bow legs. That enough changed my orientation.

Janet was a student of the Department of Biochemistry. Well, not that I did not know she would be the proud type, but at least, I needed to try my luck. And surprisingly, it worked! We started dating after the third day I broke up with the slay queen, Busola. She took me to the gate of hell, dropped me there and turned back.

Janet was a ‘booky’ person, though not sure her CGPA corresponds with her seriousness. She could promise heaven, and in the next few minutes, change her mind. And the only excuse was that Biochemistry is the toughest department in UI – as if my grandma did not finish from the same department.

Jane had no time for me at all, but she had time to task me. Most of the time, I could buy things that I would never dream of buying for myself in the next two years. And most importantly, the reason we broke up, she lied to me that she was a virgin. But she mistakenly mentioned a guy from Zik hall that mistakenly…

Yeah, don’t expect me to complete that. After the breakup. I sat down and thought within myself. I have had 3 different relationships in one session, from the same hall of residence in the same university. Awo has three letters, and I have dated three different girls so far from Awo; yeah, that’s enough.

Then I moved on to Idia. Well, not that I was not going for lectures or so unserious in my department o; I am even one of the best in my class. But love took over everything. I determined to date four girls from Idia too, since Idia has four letters. Areola came through. Yeah, she was very popular. She was giving me the total care I deserved. She was more than caring. But I was restless because of my mission.

I was expecting her to commit an error then send her packing. But she was being extremely careful. Although we later broke up in the third week. She told me she didn’t attend the Sunday service because of an assignment to be submitted on Tuesday. I got mad at her and declared my intention. Who does that?

Oh! I don’t have much ink to write this, but I’ll be brief enough. Damilola, also from Idia, is from sociology department. She loved makeup ehn. Makeup to toilet, to kitchen, to cafeteria. Not until one day I mistakenly washed her makeup. I have never, I mean never seen anyone as damn ugly as Damilola.

Ha! Did I ask you out or you asked me out yourself? Confusion everywhere. In few minutes, I made my intention known, and we broke up at the spot. The third girl from Idia was Tolu. Her friend introduced her to me anyway. I never knew UI girls too do runs o. She could pray till eternity, but hey, this lady was a full time runs somebody. Well, I won’t say more than that.

You wanna know what next? Join me again next week. Thank you!

Do you care for part 2? drop a comment in the comment boss bellow

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